Archive for December, 2009

happy new year’s eve!

Thursday, December 31st, 2009

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So in the words of the late, great Ella Fitzgerald, What are you doing New Year’s…New Year’s Eve?

even more xmas hilarity

Wednesday, December 30th, 2009

Word of the Week: Christmas blue-balled — The feeling you get when you don’t receive the gift you expected or really wanted.

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song chart memes

funny pictures of cats with captions

visiting Italy with Leanne Banks

Tuesday, December 29th, 2009

This week, we welcome back the talented Leanne Banks, who is going to share with us her inspiration for her new “Medici Men” mini-series for Silhouette Desire.  The first book, FROM PLAYBOY TO PAPA! will be out in January, followed by THE PLAYBOY’S PROPOSITION in February & SECRETS OF THE PLAYBOY’S BRIDE in March.

What inspired my new series “The Medici Men” for Silhouette Desire? Several things, but one of the biggest sources of inspiration for this new series was my trip to Italy! My husband and I joined two other couples and visited Milan, Bellagio, Florence, and Rome.

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My fave? Florence! There’s so much amazing art and history there. Seeing Michaelangelo’s famous sculpture of David was a thrilling experience. Having the opportunity to learn about some of those famous Renaissance men was fascinating.

When we were in Florence, we took a tour and learned a bit about the famous Medici family. Known as one of the big banking families, the Medicis became a powerful political and creative force. They encouraged the arts and even managed to produce two Popes. Despite centuries of power, however, the Medicis eventually died out.

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In my scrambled writer brain, I asked questions, such as what if the Medicis hadn’t really died out? What is a couple of them had secretly survived?

Then my muse took a little trip down another path. What if there were some different Medicis who’d had land in Florence, but been cheated out of it during a business deal gone bad? What if that resulted in the family being scattered? What if a Medici came to the United States and got married and had four sons? What if the father died in an accident and the mother couldn’t manage the boys anymore and they were split up into foster homes? What if one of the brothers was with the father during the accident, but his body was never found? What kind of men would these brothers grow up to be? Could they ever learn to love?

As a side note, with the exception of Damien’s name, I had some fun with the inspiration for the names of the brothers—Rafe (for Raphael), Michael (Michaelangelo), and Leo (Leonardo da Vinci)—all artists of the Renaissance.

Italy provided me with a lot of food for my muse and my belly. If I ever get a chance to return I’m sure I’ll be inspired again!

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Whaaaa! Why didn’t you tell me you were going to Italy, Leanne?  I’d have gone with you!  But, no, you had to take your stupid husband.   Sigh.  Well, I’ll try not to hold it against you, I guess!

Especially since you’re giving away another wonderful autographed copy of your first Italy-inspired “Medici Men” book, FROM PLAYBOY TO PAPA!

You heard me, ladies!  The more you post, the higher your chances to win, so feel free to quiz Leanne about her great trip or her equally great upcoming releases before she leaves us!

does this door make my butt look big?

Monday, December 28th, 2009

funny pictures of cats with captions

sexy fail Sunday (xmas edition)

Sunday, December 27th, 2009

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sexy Saturday (Xmas edition)

Saturday, December 26th, 2009

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merry christmas!

Friday, December 25th, 2009

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merry christmas eve!

Thursday, December 24th, 2009

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xmas wouldn’t be xmas without…

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009

Word of the Week: Christmas Adam December 23rd, the day before Christmas Eve. Since Adam was created before Eve, and to be equitable in the holiday season, Christmas Adam creates further anticipation of Christmas Day.

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The Anatomically Correct Gingerbread Couple

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(as baked by Madame Mommy Dearest, of course)

an interview with Leanne Banks

Tuesday, December 22nd, 2009

The time has come to pin this month’s guest blogger, the wonderful Leanne Banks, to the wall with some awkward & pressing questions. Maybe we can even find out if she’s naughty or nice before Santa comes to town…

What is your favorite color? Pink, red and blue.  (Can you tell I’m not particularly decisive?)

Favorite song? Toooo many! “Can’t Help Falling In Love With You,” “I’m Gonna Make You Mine.”

Favorite movie? The Sound Of Music. While You Were Sleeping.

And of course, favorite book? It Had To Be You by Susan Elizabeth Phillips (Note from Heidi: Loooove that one!)

What are you currently reading, & how are you enjoying it? A Silhouette Special Edition by Christine Flynn. She’s awesome. Writes sexy books with compelling characters.

What was the first book in your chosen genre that you remember reading, or that made you want to write the same? Anything by Elizabeth Lowell and Sandra Brown.

What do you think of Heidi? She’s great, right? She actually is quite great. Heidi is very fun and amusing, but she is deeper than most people realize. I’m proud of her and very thankful that I know her.  (Another intrusive note from Heidi:  Aww, that’s so sweet.  Not sure about the “deep” part, though, unless we’re talking mudpuddles. )

How did you get started writing? I lost my last pregnancy and realized I was going to have to go in a new direction. I had always LOVED romance, so I set a goal of writing and selling my first romance within two years. Kinda crazy, but I did it. My family used my advance to go to Disney World.

Tell us a little bit about your first sale. I was very depressed because I had entered a lot of contests and the critiques felt like bullets! I was upstairs with the draped pulled and the quilt pulled over my head. The phone rang. It was Kate Duffy, and my husband gave me the phone. She said. I loved your book and I want to buy it. I felt as if I were having an out-of-body experience.

Fill in the blank—If you like [blank], you’ll love Leanne Banks! If you like fun, heart-warming romance with wish fulfillment, you’ll love Leanne Banks

Tell us about “The Medici Men” series, especially FROM PLAYBOY TO PAPA!, and why we’ll love every word. “The Medici Men” is about brothers separated by tragedy and raised by foster parents. The brothers survive and thrive on their own, but need to find each other and the women who will love them in order to make their lives complete. These stories are full of romance, sexual tension, melodrama and wish fulfillment. You will root for them!

If your plane crashed in the Andes, would you convince the other survivors to eat Heidi first or last? Last, because I would want Heidi to survive and be rescued. I totally love Heidi’s bubbly personality and I have a lot of admiration for her for a lot of reasons—cats, exercise, great Mom and all.

If you could write anything—whether in the same genre/sub-genre as you’re writing now or another—what would it be? Two:   My version of erotica and women’s fiction.

What are you currently working on? Line edits for a Silhouette Desire and a Silhouette Special Edition and a single title. I’m very excited because I’ve just accepted a new 3-book contract with Special Edition.  (A final intrusive note from Heidi: Whoo-hoo times three! )

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Fabulous, Leanne, thank you so much!  And I just have to say, given your answers to Mistress Heidi’s questions, it’s obvious you have very good taste!  In books, music, movies…& people.

I can’t wait to chat with you about your return to Silhouette Special Edition, & I know others are looking forward to chatting with you about your new mini-series with Desire & your writing in general.

For everyone who does pop in to chat with & about Leanne today, you’ll be happy to know that she’s giving away an autographed copy of her first “Medici Men” title, FROM PLAYBOY TO PAPA! (not due to be released until January! ), after today’s visit.

And another next week, TUESDAY, DECEMBER 29TH, when she returns to The Dungeon one last time.

So let the posting begin!

xmas in the nuthouse

Monday, December 21st, 2009

Have I mentioned lately that once in a while I have a moment of sheer genius?

One of these moments apparently struck many Christmases ago, as evidenced by the following Christmas letter, which I recently re-discovered amongst all my Christmas cards & decorations.

Merry Christmas to all…

The past year has been a busy one & time flies when you’re in therapy five times a week.  Still, it’s hard to believe the holidays are here again already.  It seems only yesterday that we finished taking down the tree & gathering up scattered wrapping paper.  Oh, wait.  That was yesterday.

Our family has a lot to share with our friends this year.  Max, Anne, Heidi, & Toby each have a little story they’d like to share with you.  (Of course, I’m the one who gets stuck typing them.  They’re much too busy watching TV & brushing potato chip crumbs off their laps.  I hope that lousy Abominable Snowman breaks through the screen & eats them all.)

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THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

rudolph-red-nosed-reindeer.jpg Pictures, Images and PhotosWe had a little incident the Monday after Thanksgiving when Dad went out for the first day of hunting season.  It’s a hard thing to admit, but…well, I’ll just say it.  He shot Rudolph.  If truth be told, it really wasn’t Dad’s fault.  With his nose in the snow, rooting for food, Rudy looked just like any other buck.

The jingle of sleigh bells as his carcass was thrown into the back of the truck was heart-wrenching, but the up side is that we now have a really nice rack to hang above the television set—which is mysteriously getting better reception than ever before.

Dad has cautioned, however, that we must be on the lookout for eight angry buddies sent from the North Pole.  We are suspicious of the Keebler delivery van that has been parked across the street for the past two weeks.  We also found the mutilated remains of an elf on our doorstep, but can’t be sure if it’s a warning from Don Kringle or simply another “gift” from the kitties.

As difficult as this situation has been, it didn’t keep us from enjoying a delicious venison dinner.  Luckily, Rudolph’s nose lit up to let us know when he was thoroughly cooked.

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ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS ARE MY TWO LEFT FEET

PhotobucketPhotobucketMom has taken up clog dancing this past year, and even had an audition for Riverdance.  Anne is Hebrew for “Grace,” but Michael Flatley had the nerve to call her—and I quote—”a talentless clod.”  He was so disheartened by her performance that he has decided not to tour next year and may give up dancing entirely.

Mother is not discouraged, however.  She has acquired Andrew Lloyd Webber’s home phone number & calls him every hour on the hour to request the part of Rum Tum Tugger in the London cast of Cats.  She has even memorized all the words to “Memory.”  (We haven’t the heart to tell her that “Memory” is Grisabella’s song.)

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SUZY SNOWFLAKE IS A VICIOUS SLUT AND I HATE HER

Kids playing on the frozen Lake! Pictures, Images and PhotosToby will not be coming home for Christmas this year.  Unfortunately, he is snowbound at Case-Western Reserve University.  The snow is so high, they have begun digging out the dorms from the roofs down.

You will be happy to note that Toby is not trapped inside his dorm room.  Rather, he is stuck on Lake Erie—literally.  He jumped in to save a flailing Tom Hanks, but it turns out Tom was not actually drowning.  We found out later that Toby’s “heroics” had disrupted the filming of a remake of It’s a Wonderful Life.

Rescue crews have told us that it may be months before Toby is thawed.  But CWRU is doing an admirable job of keeping up his spirits.  They have set a section of Lake Erie on fire (again) & are singing Christmas carols to cheer him.

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SANTA CLAWS IS COMING TO TOWN

Santa Claws Pictures, Images and PhotosHeidi has adopted five new cats, rounding out her feline family to an even dozen.  Even with an inordinate number of pets, she still manages to remember each of their names.  A task made simpler by the fact that they are all named Here, kitty-kitty.

Although it is illegal to practice medicine in the state of Pennsylvania without a license, a few of the D.V.M.s in the area have banded together to issue Heidi an honorary veterinary degree.  She is now authorized to diagnose common ailments and prescribe necessary medications.  The entire family is very pleased that she has pronounced each of us “healthy as a horse,” thus allowing us to take large quantities of equestrian tranquilizers.

That’s all the news from the Betts family this year.  Time to pour the turkey & put the egg nog in the oven.  I mean, open the yams & mash the olives.  Hmm.  My splur is beginning to sleech.  Heidi says that’s a sure sign it’s time for my next dose of medicine.

…And to all a good night!

super Sunday

Sunday, December 20th, 2009

We’ve got prizes to give away today, which makes this a very Super Sunday, indeed!

First is an autographed copy of Leanne Banks’s From Playboy to Papa! from her visit last week.  This is the first title in her new “Medici Men” mini-series for Silhouette Desire, which won’t be released until January, so three of you (over the course of this month) will be getting very lucky sneak peeks.

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  Jen E.!!!

Congratulations, Jen!  Please contact me with your mailing information, which I’ll forward to Leanne so she can get your book to you.

And I hope everyone will pop in again this week, on TUESDAY, DECEMBER 22nd when we’ll be tossing a few of Mistress Heidi’s infamous interview questions Leanne’s way.

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Second, Mistress Heidi has four remaining “I’m changing my naughty ways…to naughtier ones” Happy Bunny 2-year planners to hand out to some of her more dedicated Darlings of The Dungeon.

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  Maisey!!!

  Dee!!!

  Netti!!!

  Jen E.!!!

Congratulations, ladies!  Just as before, please contact me with your mailing information so I…I mean, Mistress Heidi…can get your prizes out to you.

And remember, for those of you who have won, but may not already be daily visitors & frequent commentors at WIPs and Chains, by tossing your names into the bubbling cauldron of naughty & nice, you’ve pretty much signed in blood & made a solemn vow to become dedicated & subservient Darlings of The Dungeon. Don’t make Mistress Heidi get out her whip & track you down…you won’t like it if she does.

sexy Saturday

Saturday, December 19th, 2009

Zack in handyman mode:

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a Friday funny

Friday, December 18th, 2009

fail owned pwned pictures

Darn it. That was on my list, too. *snork*

fail owned pwned pictures

So what am I supposed to do with this if I can’t try anal before Christmas? Guess I’ll have to put it away until after the holidays.

a dungeon yummy

Thursday, December 17th, 2009

Fair warning that I don’t really “do” recipes.  I’m more of a pantser when it comes to cooking, & a lot of what I make I’ve made so many times before, I don’t really need a recipe.

But this is one I discovered (& doctored a bit) recently, & I thought you might like to try it for yourselves this  holiday season.  It beats canned cranberry sauce all to heck, let me tell you.

Christmas Cranberry Relish

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1 (12 oz.) bag fresh cranberries, rinsed & patted dry

1 (8 oz.) can crushed pineapple with juice

3/4 cup sugar

1/4 cup orange juice (or Grand Marnier/orange-flavored liqueur)

2 oranges, peeled & cut

1/2 cup chopped pecans

Place cranberries, pineapple, sugar, & orange juice in saucepan.  Bring to boil over medium heat.  Reduce heat & simmer just until berries burst.  Remove from heat.  Let cool.  Stir in oranges & nuts.  Refrigerate.