Since my birthday is coming up (only three more days! 
), expect a lot of birthday stuff to be going on here in The Dungeon for the next week or so.
And also since my birthday is coming up, I figure I can do whatever I want.
(Why should my birthday be different from any other day of the year, right? 
)
So I’ve decided to shake things up a bit. Instead of Super Sunday, today is what I like to call “Sexy Fail Sunday.”
Now, as soon as you see the picture at the bottom of this post, you’re totally going to get it. But in case you need me to define the term “Sexy Fail,” let’s just say it’s basically someone who thinks they look good or are trying to look hot…but so miss the boat! We’re talking failure of epic proportions on the sexy-meter. And we’re not just talking about guys, here, but women, too. Although I have a feeling the men are going to be way more amusing.
I’ll start you out with something fairly tolerable. But believe me, they get worse… 
major fail
Just…….eeewwww.
Epic. Fail. Failtastic.
And now…a sexy fail…brought to you by…Rachel Ray? is she supposed to be sexy??
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dtIlq_4T46Q/SEM_J8f-lSI/AAAAAAAAALk/OjdjyQMksMQ/s400/Rachel+Ray.jpg
Oh…this just gets sadder.
http://www.jossip.com/wp/docs/2009/03/rachelray02-320×400.jpg
I wouldn’t cook that way…oil splatters hurt like hell.
yeah…fail!! capital FAIL!
Hey Laura…can you train these guys please…i realllllyyy think they are needing you help!
Heidi, are you *sure* this is how you want to start birthday week?
This is what I call the “butt” of all jokes?
Soooo….is jockstrap central a place to buy jockstraps? Or is it a fetish site?
based on picture #2 I’d say fetish site.
I think those two gentlemen are performing a “Brokeback Mountain” maneuver–the first fellow is the “mountain” and he’s performing a “brokeback” on the second.
I was thinking it was an advertisement for the Wedgie-Matic 5000
Yeah…if you’re a football player pictures like that are the LAST thing you want to see on like, a teammates cellphone. Eek.
And my husband, upon seeing the pictures of Rachel Ray, said ‘they should have slathered her in a little EVOO.’ (that’s extra virgin olive oil, for those not familiar with her) Then he saw the jockstrap pictures and promptly gouged out his own eyes. Nooo, not really. I may not be getting any action for a while though…
Super Bowl celebration pictures?
This entire website is a sexy fail.
http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/
Gah. My retinas are burned out. Surfed through like twenty pages of the wal mart site.
Question: Heidi, how did you find (why did you find) and gay jockstrap fetish site?
Ah, what a fun way to begin my birthday week. I’m just sitting back, LMAO at all of your reactions. *snicker snicker snicker*
Expect more of the same in the future. The same, only…worse.
Worse than wedgiematic 5000?
May I just say, not an especially appetizing package. I’d return to sender.
The cat eating cake is a much more pleasant sight.
uh, well…hmmmm….uh…::scratcheshead::…oh…uh…hmmmmmm…maybe if I turn the picture this…no that didn’t work…
The sad thing? This is actually super sexy to someone. This is someone’s fetish. There are guys, maybe even women, who find those pictures Heidi posted to be the frickin’ hottest thing they’ve seen. Someone is drooling on their keyboard over those images right now. *ick*
Re the wal mart people site, I want to know which one of them looked in the mirror and says ‘yeah, lookin good! Time to go to the Wal Mart!’
Not me Maisey. I’m going back to Saturday.
Hey–hate to change the subject (though temporarily, I’m sure!), you can update my ITryWriMo meter to 10,454. I’ve been having problems seeing the meters, but I’m sure Maisey is still kicking my ass. However, I’ve loved the company and the competition and it’s really been helping me write!
At least they’re not also covered in black wax and singing Ave Maria. Now that I shoved that memory back into a air tight vault…
But what if your words are better than mine?
Congrats to all who are in the ITryWriMo process.
Dee-
WHAT??
Picture it…New York City September 1998…
This was when I still was working at the Hallmark store during my college days. After our shift, my friend Tricia, another coworker and I went into the city to go clubbing. This was my first clubbing experience and we were going to a place called “The Tunnel” which is you guessed it…a renovated old subway tunnel. It was owned by the same people who owned the Limelight.
So we’re in the main club which is fun. We stay away from the go go dancing cages and order our own drinks, etc. Just hanging out with friends. Then Tasha, our coworker, told us there was a private fashion show downstairs. Since she was going to FIT, we thought nothing of it. So we go downstairs and it was wall to wall goths. They looked at me and Tricia like we’re freaks.
So we’re trying to blend in without getting in trouble. I envied the cool long skirt one of Tasha’s male friends was wearing. Suddenly, Tricia elbows me and said “Look at the lifelike mural of the naked guy chained to the boulder back there.” I look and mutter “That is not a mural…what the f–k is this?”
So starts the beginning of “How Dee accidentally ends up at an S&M show”. So, we get entertained by the pouring of hot wax on people, some dude in a feathered headdress talking about contempt, despair and failure while they whip the boulder guy. Then they start singing Ave Maria while doing some interpretive dancing and more wax pouring.
The truly sad part of it is I went to a funeral the weekend after and they played Ave Maria. My mom was so worried about me when I broke down into hysterical sobs.
uhoh my comments are not showing up
Yeah Dee, WHAT?
no wait, maybe I don’t want to know.
Dee~ I have rescued your comments from the great beyond.
(No idea why they were getting caught up. 
)
Pam~ I’ll update your meter, but they’re not showing up again today. Don’t ask me what the problem is. Universal cyber-glitch, maybe?
Oh, & the Wal-Mart pics are toooooo funny. Scary thing is that you can walk into any Wal-Mart & see that sort of thing. It’s scary, really. And then sometimes you walk in looking not so hot yourself because you know the standards are low. But now that I know people might be taking my pic, I’m going to be more careful!
I guess black wax got them caught in the filter
Dee-
OWWWWW my mind’s EYE!!!
The new post is NOT letting me comment. Flippin’ evil. Same glitch as last time. :-( Boo. I’ll be cut off from the dungeon tomorrow.
Heidi- I know. They could all be my local wal mart, but only one I saw today said Oregon.
And the meter on my blog, which has the same host as yours, is not working either. So the glitch is on their end.
Yeah, I was scarred by it all, although boulder boy did have a great ass
LOL. I went to the people of Walmart site. Yes…I was bored. What can I say, my ebook reader is charging so I can’t do any of my book reviews? LOL. I have found some of the greatest/ickiest pics!
http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/?paged=33 first picture, looks like he had hair from his groin surgically put on his bald spot.
http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/?paged=46 last picture, check out the caption lol. it says it all!
http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/?paged=76 The freaking shorts are awesome! 1st picture.
Dee, this does atone for some of the horror.
I am dungeonless today! Wahhh!!! Stupid IE!!!
Maisey